Life Goes On

For the 3rd time this week I'm back at the same spot on Sunset, squatting down on the curb and wondering again what happened. The ribbon around the pole and the flowers that were left over the weekend are all gone. But glancing at the curb you see the spot where the paint scraped as the motorcycle hit the curb and the marks on the pole that I imagine weren't there before last Friday. I've spent most of my time since then in a kind of daze. Unfocused. Mind all over the place. Wondering over and over. What happened?

If there's anyone in the world or my small little piece of it that should be numb to this kind of tragedy it'd have to be me. All the funerals add up. But not when it's somebody you grew up with. Not your homeboy who was engaged to get married this August and you were just talking to about the bachelor party, making plans for a guys weekend fishing trip up to Mammoth. Not to a family who's already lost their father and another son.


Sitting with my brother and helping him write out the personal history he's going to read at the funeral Friday while we dig thru our old pics looking for pics of our friend it hits. Hard. Both of us have tears in our eyes but nobody mentions it.

They say life goes on. I just wish life had a level playing field.